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Raising A Leader – johanna
January 4th, 2010 | Filed under: THE DISH ON PARENTING, THE ORGANIZED HOME
To become a successful leader kids need to learn responsibility somewhere. That begins in the home when they are young by building their confidence through applauding small achievements. Some may have negative feelings toward chores because of the way they were brought up. I know I often felt like I was a slave rather than a kid but as I matured and gained insight I realized the responsibilities thrown at me as a kid has taught me how to be self-reliant as an adult.
Chores can be a positive and constructive way to build confidence and teach leadership through responsibility. Boys especially need chores. We are no longer a society that sends our boys out to work in the field all day. They relish the satisfaction of a job done well. Boys love to solve problems. They also need structure and to be held accountable. Give them a task and help them learn how to go about completing that task by giving them clear concise directions but with a little leeway for creativity and a consequence to hold them to it and they will radiate confidence.
Chores are also a way to teach our children how to one day care for their own homestead; moreover, chores teach them to respect property and accountability. Boys should learn to cook, clean, do dishes and mend clothing just like girls should know how to care for their car, take out the trash, repairs and mow the law.
Know What Is Expected- Be Consistent.
I think we can agree that chores are not on our kids list of top priorities. Whenever my mom would ask my brother to clean up his reply was always “I am eating.” Somehow he was absolved without any further discussion. My daughter though she is three takes after he Uncle Todd. When asked to clean up she will lie down and feign she is oh so tired.
If you implement a system you have to be ready and willing to be consistent because they will fight you on it. They will push the boundaries a little to see how tough you are. Lay out the rules so they know what is expected of them and hold them to it. We are a team and we work together to keep the home functioning.
- Use a chore chart to help them keep track of the chores they are responsible for. There are a myriad of charts out there. Behavioral charts use motivational cues such as rewards. Chore charts can be a spinning wheel to cards. Just search Chore Charts in Google Images to find something that fits your family.
Set a time frame. Something like all their chores must be done before school or by dinnertime. For younger children the consequence might be if you have to pick up their toys you get to keep them. The next day when they ask to play with them you calmly remind them why they are put away and that they may have them tomorrow or they must earn them back. For teens you might take away a privilege. They can’t go out with their friends, play video games or watch TV.
A timer works well to keep them on task. If they insist they are too tired or hungry to do their chore set the timer for 15 minutes. Once the timer goes off they must complete the chore or there are consequences.
Play to the age group.
Create the habit of cleaning up by introducing the concept of chores at an early age. Kids can learn at one year of age how to pick up their toys and throw away their diaper. The little ones love to imitate mom and dad hard at work. Let them contribute in their own way even though you will have to go back later to “fix” the job. Little ones can help vacuum, sweep, wash dishes and help make the bed. As they grow look for tasks they are good at and those that will help improve developmental milestones.
Since our kids are young their chores are pretty simple. I help the two year old clean the loft, the three year old has to keep the downstairs free of toys and clothing (since she is the one who usually puts them there) and the five year old chooses a task to complete each day. It could be emptying the laundry baskets or shredding papers. They are also responsible for cleaning their own room as well as helping set and clear the table. It was interesting to note one day when our five year old left something downstairs and the three year old got onto him about it. She was showing accountability for her area.
Make a list then have them choose the one they would like to be responsible for. I mentioned that the two younger children have specific household chore they are responsible for overseeing each day while the oldest may choose. When dealing out chores the first criteria to take into consideration should be age and the second the child. Our oldest is five and a highly creative kinetic learner. We know that he performs best when given the leeway to do it his way. Our daughter does not like change. She prefers to know what is expected of her in advance.
Make chores fun.
Play to a child is their job. Some days it is a struggle to get the kids to finish their chores. Other days they beg me to let them help me with mine.
- The kitchen floor becomes a skating rink. Wrap wet rags around their feet and let them skate to mop the floor.
- The sink becomes a car wash. Little ones love to play in the suds. They may start out playing with their cars and end up washing dishes, the chairs, the cabinets and even you.
- Play a game under the blanket to make the bed. The kids can pretend they are in a cave. Spread the bedding out over them smoothing the edges to make the bed. Reaching in from the bottom of the bed grab their feet and pull them toward you and off the end of the bed. Then attack them with tickles and kisses. move on to the next bed.
As a mom I understand the biggest hurtle is time. School and extra-curricular activities do not leave much time for quality family time or responsibilities at home. Your plan and how it is carried out depends on your family dynamics and the specific chores. After a six hour day at school the last thing I want to ask of my child when he gets home from school is to complete his chore, especially if he has homework and sports practice. We have tried early morning chores before school. Before bed time did not work either. We have small children who go to bed early to ensure they get the maximum sleep needed. In the mornings it is a race to get everyone dressed, fed and out the door. We have found right before dinner works best in our home, if weekdays are too hectic schedule chores on the weekends.
May Website Review: Inhabitots.com – johanna
May 1st, 2009 | Filed under: THE BOOKSHELF, THE ORGANIZED HOME
Jill Fehrenbacher is the Founder and Editor-in-Chief of Inhabitat.com; a weblog devoted to tracking sustainable living trends in design innovation. Inhabitat.com’s philosophy considers not only design, but also the materials used, practices, function and purpose. They are somewhat frustrated with the growing hype on “Green Design”. Simply stating “good design is not about color, style or trends - but instead about thoughtfully considering the user, the experience, the social context and the impact of an object on the surrounding environment.” “No design can be considered good design unless it at least attempts to address some of these concerns.”
In the summer of 2008 Inhabitots.com was born. Jill was pregnant anxiously awaiting the arrival of her first baby. For many, the birth of their first child marks a turning point and often times an urge to step back, slow down and most recently ‘go green’ by way of housing the use of organic products and food. Committed to the belief “that becoming a parent doesn’t have to mean sacrificing style or ideals”, Jill launched her campaign in “sustainable design for the next generation“. Inhabitots is a supplement website created for children and parents who are interested in sustainable modern design for kids.
The Traveling Snack Bag – johanna
March 30th, 2009 | Filed under: CREATING MEMORIES, THE ORGANIZED HOME
While we teach the kids the importance of sharing, sometimes it is better to choose your battles. So it is with the case of the one-eyed woolly monster. My friend relayed a story once about her husband and cereal. Growing up, it was first come, first serve. If you lagged behind, there was a pretty good chance you would not eat or find disappointment that your favorite cereal was all gone. To compensate, the boys would overeat on their share of cereal.
Some days, my kids behave like they are going to starve to death fighting over who holds the snack bag; or how much the other can have. They act like a one-eyed woolly monster; a term I got from Caillou. His mom used a similar term to describe his moody and selfish behavior. To remedy the problem, I give them each their own snack bag. When we travel, it is the same. They each get to pack a lunch and snacks. They enjoy being in charge of their own bag. Many times, they surprise us and offer to share their snacks with a hungry brother or sister who has gulped theirs all up.
I Love Cleaning My Kitchen Table Chairs – johanna
March 26th, 2009 | Filed under: THE ORGANIZED HOME
I did it. I covered my chair cushions with clear vinyl from the fabric store. I know for years it was a decor no-no. I thought so, until I saw a picture in “Traditional Home”. If Clinton and Stacy from “What not to Wear” were here, I know they would say, “Just because it is in a magazine, does not mean you should do it.”
My sister-n-law, Natalie, gave us her slightly used table and chairs, all from Ikea. What I love most about the chairs, are the seat cushions. The fabric is actually a cover. I did not know that until the first time I removed the cushions from the chair to measure for replacement material. I threw the covers in the wash instead of buying new ones. They have been spilled on, stained, and bleached until there is no hope left.
The chairs in the magazine looked fabulous. Originally, we looked at other styles of vinyl, but I was not satisfied with the selections available. I found some decent upholstery material on sale for a dollar and decided, if it is going to last, I would have to cover it with the clear vinyl. It is not like I went and covered my living room couches and chairs. Most important of all, they are kid proof. I giggle every time I swipe the rag across the chair seat. Cleaning is a cinch. No more scrubbing. No more bleaching.
Scout out fabric discount stores, yard sales and thrift stores for deals on fabric. Belive it or not, I used to find beautiful fabric at Walmart. When I decorated our first house, I found amazing deals at a $2.00 fabric store. Material that regularly costs between $15 - $20, was $1.00 - $10. Other tools may include a pair of scissors, a staple gun with staples and 1 1/2 inch foam. WikiHow has a step by step tutorial on how to reupholster a dining chair.
Neighborhood Yard Sale – johanna
March 21st, 2009 | Filed under: THE ORGANIZED HOME
With the arrival of Spring, home improvement centers often showcase storage and organization products to aide with the task of spring cleaning. This is the time to go through each room and determine what needs to go and what can stay. The experts suggest using a box for trash, one for charity and one for stay. The Fly Lady recommends tackling room clutter in 15 minute segments.
What to do with all that clutter? Coordinate a neighborhood yard sale. Have those participating chip in to pay for advertising and to help make signs. I went to a neighborhood garage sale when I lived in the North Bay. There were homes who had used items to sell and there were homes that sold baked goods or handmade crafts.
Check with the city to see about any permits needed. Try selling any unsold items in excellent condition on Craig’s List or Ebay. We want to squeeze out every penny we can. Beware of hidden charges, though. Ebay takes a certain percentage of the sale so make sure it is worth the time and effort. You also want to make sure you calculate the shipping properly. Sometimes it is just cheaper to drop it off at a charity.
Spring Cleaning I Can Handle – johanna
January 21st, 2009 | Filed under: THE ORGANIZED HOME
I scoffed at the weatherman last year when he announced it was officially Fall. 90 degrees does not constitute Fall in my head. Fall is warm sweaters, a crisp to the air, and apples. It is the middle of January and heavy coats and boots have been put aside for lighter jackets. I waited so long for the chill to come and in four weeks it looks as though Jack Frost forgot us this year.
This year I am working on looking at the brighter side of life. I am thrilled that the weather is now suitable for walks with my friends, park days and best of all open windows with fresh air streaming through them. It absolutely feels of Spring. It must be because all I want to do is spring clean.
I used to subscribe to The fly Lady. My sister-n-law Natalie introduced me to her before I had kids. Every year around this time I remember to check in with the site. She gives a detailed weekly list on how to clean, organize and declutter the home.Â
Before kids spring cleaning was a regular occurrence at our house. Every six months I tore through the entire house organizing and purging. Every week the base boards and cabinets were part of my cleaning repertoire. Now I am lucky if the cabinets get a wipe down once a year. The plan is to complete one major project a week. Last week I scoured the kitchen from top to bottom. This week is curtains and blinds. Next week I set the house cleaning aside to work on my garden. Then I start on cleaning the carpets and finally the windows to let all that magnificent sunshine in. I do not want to do it. But I am making myself no matter how hard I scream because I know in the end the accomplishment will make me feel better.
Exercise and Quality Mommy Time? Check! – johanna
January 14th, 2009 | Filed under: THE ORGANIZED HOME
I went running this morning and I found the energy I had been looking for. The weather has been beautiful all week. I just had to get out and take advantage of it before it turns rainy or cold again. Mild weather is certainly one benefit of living in the Valley.
I am not a runner in the least bit, but the tally of weight gain since the turn of seasons last November does not look good. I quit walking because I found myself overwhelmed with all the demands of the day. Slowly I crossed off activities until I found a manageable schedule. Unfortunately exercise was one of the activities. That was probably not the smartest of moves to take during the holidays with all baking that ensued. Everett and Adelin want nothing to do with the stroller and the most I managed to log on the elliptical before a crisis hit was 17 minutes.
Now that the weather is a smidgen warmer I devised a plan. All I had to do was motivate myself to run to the park (2 1/2 miles away) play with the kids for an hour and a half and run back home. It worked out as planned. About the time they started getting restless we arrived at the park. Now, the question is…will they continue to cooperate.
January’s Website Review: The Happiness Project & My Simpler Life – johanna
December 31st, 2008 | Filed under: THE BOOKSHELF, THE DISH ON PARENTING, THE ORGANIZED HOME
This month’s website review happens to include two websites; The Happiness Project and My Simpler Life.
THE HAPPINESS PROJECT is a memoir written by Gretchen Rubin about her year long adventure as she sets out to test every theory, tip and scientific study on being happier. The website is her daily blog on the subject.
MY SIMPLER LIFE - SIMPLE LIVING
Beth Dargis is a simplicity coach. Her goal is to help teach others how to love life, work hard and have fun, how to stay positive and take time to relax. She helps her clients “uncover what is the most important things for them to be doing.” She coaches those individuals “searching for something more in their life while releasing what they no longer need.” There is no need to become a client in order to become inspired or get tips on time management off of Beth’s website.
Both The Happiness Project and My Simpler Life teach how to step back, breathe and enjoy what we have at the moment. My brother once told me you are who you are now, unless you change who you are today. I have come to realize their is never going to be a better day than today unless I make it so. I find I am happier when I break free of me. When I can step back and think of all the joy around me. It takes time and a lot of practice. I am also trying to laugh more. Something I lost for a while. It is really hard to be angry when I am laughing or singing.
Stay Organized With A To-Go Tote – johanna
October 14th, 2008 | Filed under: THE ORGANIZED HOME
I found this idea as part of my quest for organizing, posted by Calm & Collected Organizing.
“Get things done on the go with a special tote bag dedicated to running errands and staying organized. Attach a hook to the wall near the door that you leave the house from each day. This is where you’ll hang your To-Go Tote each time you come into the house or once you’ve finished using it.
As you go through your day or evening at home and you come across items that you’ll need when running errands later, place them in your To-Go Tote, and you won’t forget them the next time you leave the house. Just be sure to grab the tote each time you head out!
Extra Tip: Keep blank notecards and envelopes in your To-Go Tote. The next time you’re out and waiting for an appointment or to pick up the kids, you can write that thank you note you’ve been meaning to get to!!!”
The local school district is sponsoring a school fundraiser at the local mall. 24 area schools are participating in the event to raise money for their school by decorating tote bags. Our preschool class used their fingerprints to create beautiful butterflies, bees, ladybugs, frogs and flowers. All of the totes will be displayed and then available for auction. I am hoping to snag one to use as my To-Go Tote.
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